The nation is shocked and angry

As the nation slowly comes to terms with the aftermath of the Mumbai terror attacks, it is clear that the Indian public is fed up of the inefficiency of those who are supposed to be in charge of this country. Questions are being asked, politicians suddenly find themselves being openly chided like never before.

The nation has had to pay a heavy price for the follies of these self serving netas. It is time to make these clowns realise that we have given them all that they have today, and we could as easily take all back atleast once every five years. The all powerful Indira Gandhi learned this lesson in 1977 elections. It is time to remind the politicians about the power of democracy.

Breaking the Silence - Sexual Minorities Come Out in Kerala

I have been told that the event planned for 13th November at Kozhikode has been cancelled. It seems, there is an event happening at Bangaluru on 14th November.

Really disappointed about this. I do hope the event would be held sometime in the near future...

The plight of sexual minorities in Kerala...

13th November 2008 (Thursday), Calicut

Anything connected with sex is suppressed in Kerala. Morality has become an obsession with Kerala's societal attitude, cutting across the divides of class, gender, caste and religion. While in a majority of countries women can work and live as singles and contribute to social production, in Kerala, such people are largely isolated and kept aloof from the public sphere. The question of sexual rights occupies limited spaces of socio-political discourse in Kerala. The mainstream political parties here are yet to identify or acknowledge the politics of queer activism. 

We seem to have reached a point that no political movement can move ahead unless the conspiracy of silence about sexuality is broken. The politics of sexuality cannot wait till all the problems related with globalization and unemployment are solved forever. We need to talk about sexual rights as we do about any other fundamental rights.

Kerala is one of the very few states in India where the CPI(M) has been most active over the years. It would be interesting to juxtapose this with the fact that in September 2003, All India Democratic Women's Association (the women's fraction of CPI(M)) had sent a note to the Indian Govt. to scrap IPC 377. But one doesn't seem to have reached its own cadres in Kerala even after 5 years. 

Section 377 of IPC is challenged in the Delhi High Court and the final hearings are on now. Large scale sexual minority mobilizations took places in Bangalore, Mumbai, Delhi and Kolkata in the recent past demanding the repeal of IPC 377. This brought about enormous media coverage all over India but not in Kerala. While the Kerala Government is extremely keen reaching out to homosexual/bisexual men to use them for HIV prevention initiatives, one can clearly notice that there is absolute disregard for their human rights.

Hijras are visible and tolerated in most parts of India. Meanwhile, they are scared even to visit Kerala for a short-time. Most of the Keralite hijras migrate and live in Chennai, Bangalore, Mumbai and other parts of India. They are forced to present themselves in male attire when they visit their families in Kerala. 

Lesbians or gays or transgenders find it extremely difficult to have social space in Kerala. They are viewed as objects of curiosity and fun that attracts the media attention. There have been many an instances of lesbian suicides in Kerala over the years. The situation is such, that if they are to make a living, they would have to migrate to other states in India. The media mostly chooses to ignore such issues, preventing them from becoming a matter of public debate. Recent suicide of a gay couple in Ernakulam attracted very little media coverage. Most progressive groups in Kerala too ignored this.

PM skips gay issue, leaves it to Ramadoss, Patil

Fri, Oct 17 02:23 AM

Avoiding any judgmental call on the conflict over orthodoxy and liberalism, Prime Minister Manmohan Singh on Thursday asked health minister A Ramadoss and home minister Shivraj Patil to sit together and sort out the issue over legalising homosexuality.

''The Prime Minister has directed the two ministers to sit together and discuss the matter and sort out differences,'' science and technology minister Kapil Sibal told reporters after the cabinet meeting.

The contentious subject has developed into a major controversy after health minister Ramadoss, a qualified doctor himself, sought legalisation of homosexuality arguing that it can help in better treatment of people suffering from HIV/AIDs. Ramadoss' latest campaign, however, has encountered strong opposition from the Union home ministry, which holds the traditional view that gay sex is immoral. In the same vein, the Indian Penal Code (IPC) under Section 377 bans sexual relations among people of the same gender and carries a punishment of upto life imprisonment for such acts.

The matter came up before the Union cabinet in the backdrop of the Delhi high court pulling up the Centre on Wednesday while hearing a Public Interest Litigation (PIL) that has challenged the legality of Section 377. While responding to the court's queries, the additional solicitor general PP Malhotra had cited religious texts to justify the prohibition of gay sex in the country.

Ticking off the government counsel for relying on religious texts, the court had asked it to come up with scientific reports instead in justification of the ban.

The court maintained that India would not be the first country to decriminalise homosexuality in that case that it did. ''Your arguments should be based on scientific reports. Show us scientific reports which justify criminalisation of such acts,'' the division bench comprising chief Justice AP Shah and Justice S Muralidhar had said on Wednesday.

The government, however, faces a paradoxical situation as the National Aids Control Organisation has already filed an affidavit on behalf of the Union health ministry which holds that sex among consenting adults belonging to the same gender should be decriminalised. The dilemma before the government was further evident when Kapil Sibal told reporters that it would abide by any court decision on the issue. ''Whatever the court decides, we will agree'' he said. He said the cabinet deferred a decision on the issue as it was already being argued before the court.

Ramadoss, who successfully led the campaign against smoking and was instrumental in laying severe restrictions over smoking in public, had said that he would take up the issue of legalising homosexuality with the Prime Minister after his ministry was ticked off by the home ministry in the courts.

Claiming support from ''progressive'' ministers in the Union cabinet, Ramadoss has proposed abolishing of the penal provision on those found indulging in gay sex.

There has been varying views on the subject, with some like NHRC chief S Rajendra Babu supporting the decriminalisation of homosexuality.

Show scientific proof to ban homosexuality: court

Wed, Oct 15 07:47 PM

New Delhi, Oct 15 (IANS) The Delhi High Court Wednesday pulled up the government for using inadequate evidence to oppose decriminalisation of gay sex in private among consenting adults.

Additional Solicitor General P.P. Malhotra, while arguing before a division bench headed by Chief Justice Ajit Prakash Shah and Justice S. Muralidhar, cited a verse of the Bible condemning gay sex.

But the court did not seem to be convinced by the government's contention and asked it to produce scientific evidence to justify the ban on homosexuality.

'Show us some scientific report which says that gay sex should be criminalised,' the bench observed.

The court also asked the government to place before it the reports of the World Health Organisation (WHO) on the issue of health hazards arising out of criminalisation of gay sex.

'We are not taking it (religious literature). We will be going by your report submitted by NACO (National Aids Control Organisation). We would rely on that report. You can counter it by some scientific report,' the bench said.

The central government had previously argued during the case that repealing Section 377 would allow HIV/AIDS to spread, and that homosexuality is a reflection of a 'perverse mind'.

'We cannot compel our society to follow the trend of western society. There is no concept of sexual orientation in the Indian constitution,' Malhotra said.

The Indian Penal Code terms homosexual acts as an offence under section 377, which provides for punishment up to life imprisonment.

The government had earlier taken a contradictory stand, with the home ministry favouring section 377 and the health ministry opposing its enforcement in the case of consenting adults.

The court was hearing a petition filed by 13 NGOs, including Naz Foundation, seeking the court's direction to decriminalise homosexual acts among consenting adults by amending Section 377 of the Indian Penal Code.

the Indian government wants to keep Article 377

the central government has submitted to the court that it wants to keep the article 377 intact. This is the article which prohibits any form of unnatural sexual activity, the one that makes homo sex a crime.

very sad that the the world's largest democracy has a government that wishes to regulate what happens in the bedrooms of the citizens. this administration has proved grossly inefficient in dealing with the problems faced by the common man. it would do well to get focus on providing some semblance of governance.

the fun...

last week i met a likeminded person. hewas eighteen and we had quite a good session of mutual fun.

The quest continues..

I have been searching for a long term gay friend for quite some time now. The friends that I have are not from the same locality that I am currently in. So the need for a companion at Kozhikode is very much intense for me.

 In the last ten days, I met three persons. The common ground was that all three are looking for a long term gay friend. Unfortunately, none of the meetings proved to be fruitful. In case you are wondering, I had sexual activity with only one among these three. Even that was far from satisfying for both of us.

 Why did the three meetings turn out to be unsuccessful?

 The first person was a youngster who wanted to have fun. We had met earlier also and at that time we had some fun, but stopped before the climax because of circumstantial constraints. This time also, we stopped well before the fun actually started. My feeling was that the guy was not sure of himself. He had no sexual experience prior to meeting me, and he seemed to be still exploring his sexuality.

 The second person is the one with whom some sexual activities happened. The person was unable to sustain himself. Repeatedly he kept failing to maintain the erection. At last, I stopped the activity and saved him further embarrassment.

 The third one was the most disappointing for me. We had talked over the phone the day before. He told me he was a gay looking for long term relationship (the same that the others also said, but with more conviction). After we got together, he turned out to be a person looking to gratify his needs and not concerned about his partner’s. He too was most uncomfortable with himself. We spent almost an hour together and I purposefully did not initiate any intimacy as I was so much worried about his uncertainty. After the chat that we had the day before, he had come across as a person very sure of himself and his likes. Unfortunately, this was not the case when we met in person.

 I know a relationship does not happen in one or two meetings. It takes time to get used to each other and establish a rapport. But, the indecisive nature of a partner is the worst thing that could happen in a date. One has to have a clear idea about what one is looking for, how far one could go, and more importantly let the partner know the same in most certain terms.

 Is anybody listening?????  And so the quest continues….

Stirring thought...

This is a picture from the Mumbai Queer Pride parade that took place on 16th August 2008. 

The slogan is a real gem... In any kind of relationship, it has to be honesty, sincerity and the depth of the love that should be focused on.

I wonder when India would be ready to accept the same sex relations ship that is quite wide spread than the mainstream media would have us believe.

Some progress on removing article 377 ??

A news item which caught my attention two days ago on yahoo is given below.

Ramadoss backs gay rights, says Sec 377 must go

Sat, Aug 9 02:58 AM

Stating that India was witnessing the "stabilisation of the HIV epidemic", Union Health Minister Dr Anbumani Ramadoss today favoured legalising homosexuality and removing discrimination against other vulnerable sections like sex workers to contain the spread of the virus.

Addressing the 17th International Conference on AIDS in Mexico City, the Minister expressed his strong support for the draft legislation on HIV which is currently with the Law Ministry.

"Structural discrimination against those who are vulnerable to HIV such as sex workers and MSM must be removed if our prevention, care and treatment programmes are to succeed," he said. "Section 377 of the IPC, which criminalises men who have sex with men, must go," he added.

"India's dedicated focus on HIV prevention is fetching dividends. We are seeing the beginning of the stabilisation of the HIV epidemic in India," said Ramadoss. Saying that the key to overcome the HIV epidemic was to take the services to those on the margins of society, he added, "we can only do that in an enabling environment".

_______________________________________________________________________________________________

 A ray of hope for people like me...

Silent days

I haven't posted anything for quite sometime now. I had fever for one week and afterwards, it took another week for me to regain my normal physical agility.

There was rain for some days and the climate had gotten so cold and damp. Apart from the fever, it was the strain and tiredness caused by the illness that troubled me the most. Inspite of taking some tablets for two days, the condition kept getting worse. Atlast i decided to go for homeo medicine and consulted a doctor. I feel it was a wise decision as the homeo medicines saved me the side effects that usually comes with the alopathic ones.

Feeling lucky??

I have been searching for a steady GAY friend for so long....

Recently I got acquainted to a promising prospect, over the phone. So often, people say they want long term relationship, but actually looking for one or two sexual encounters. The gay scene is so volatile, I hope i would fine my love soon...

These days the chat rooms are full of students who have completed SSLC or Degree courses and are waiting for the higher studies classes to commence..it is nice to have so many young people around, but these guys are often not sure about themselves and what they need.it is understandable, given their age. i can only wish these children do not fall into any kind of trap in their quest to explore the world...

Why do you need picture upfront??

So often, I come across netizens who ask for a pic before any sort of acquaintance is made. I find this strange and somwhat annoying.Why do we give so much importance to looks?

I admit looks are important and one has to like what one see, if the relationship has to bee strong.But, is looks the most important factor? I dont think so.And, it is actually not safe to share pics with a person whom you have just met over the internet.One has to try and understand what lies beneath,no naughty thoughts pls...., and communication through words is the most needed medium.For me, looks are secondary.I have often come across dashing, model like material which does not offer much in terms of emotional substance.

sexually active or not???

we often come across such situations where we are attracted to someone, but can not be sure about the sexuality or response of the other person.this is especially difficult for gays.

many men actually like to have the pleasure of getting sucked, doing anal or oral fucking.these men may not necessarily be gay, but still love the feel of it.especially since in places like Kerala, unless you are married, you have very little chances of having a sexual relationship with another person.homosexual experiences could be a relief for the aching body and mind.

the big question is, how to identify interested people with out offending them.i have been lucky enough to have had many successful experiences, but still i have not found a steady gay partner.

The weekend

It was a busy weekend. I went for a house warming function on Sunday, with my friend. It was nice to see the amount of co-operation and togetherness that still prevails in the villages of Kerala.I am afraid the joy of sharing among the neighbours, is a thing of the past for city dwellers like me.

We travelled by bus instead of my Pulasr because of the rain. This gave me the opportunity to relax and keep my senses open to new refreshing sights.Of course, this included cute faces and lovely, tempting specimens of handsomeness.

The rhythm of rain..

I have always been mesmerised by the beauty and rhythm of rain.Having grown up in the beautiful state of Kerala with its long monsoon season, I feel romantic and more erotic when rain pours down.

I have wonderful memories of so many rainy days and more vivid nights, spent in the close company of my first gay partner.We used to sleep together in rainy nights and if the thunder lights were photo flshes, the album would have been a masterpiece of gay erotic art.

Now as the water drops knocks at my window, I feel nostalgic.

 

Yesterday's fun

I met a like minded person yeterday, and we had a great time.I hope to see him again soon.

My city...

Calicut is the place where I live. It is not my native place, but I like the freindly and unassuming nature of the people here.It is true that I find the people here to be very conservative, in many ways,and I am under the impression that it is this conservative outlook that keeps the city from relaising its full potential.

Having said this, it might sound ironical that, of the many places that I have lived in, I feel this is the place which has the most visible gay community.There are many locations to look out for gay men, and gay sex workers are also easily gettable, though I would advise that this could be really risky in more ways than one.

The stigma

It is quite evident that Kerala, much like the rest of the country has still not acknowledged the fact that homosexuality is a reality.One can find any number of articles and advisory columns, even by quailified medical practitioners, telling that homosexuality is a psychological disorder that has to be treated and remedied.

It is worth noting that, a society that prides on false notions of equality and modernistic outlook, turns hypocritical when anything related to hmosexuality is mentioned.Infact, the Indian scociety and Keralites in particular, shuns any meaningful dicussion or analysis of sexuality as a whole, whether its is homo or hetro in nature. Of late, some national news channels have been telecasting programmes focussing on sexuality which is an encouraging sign.

Still in the closet

I am not out to the society I live in, about my sexuality. Only three of my closest friends know about it.

The first friend has over the years shared many blissful sexual moments with me.He too actively participated in these activities and has always been equally interested.He is now married and settled.

The second friend know I am gay.He is straight and does not have any sexual relationship with me. He does not approve of my sexuality, but still maintains good friendhip with me.

The third friend is also straight. He has been a passive partner for me, I have had the ooportunity to explore him over the years.He enjoys the bliss, but is afraid to admit the same.As a result, he sometimes denies the bliss to himself and to me.He is my closest friend, and we have so much love and affection for each other.

It is becoming increasingly difficult for me to lead the dual life. I know I am a GAY, but am not able to acknowledge the same in public. There are many reasons for this predicament...

When and How?

When and How did I realize I am gay?

Well, it is hard for me to absolutely sure about the time. I remeber that I used to enjoy groping and sucking with a class mate while I was studying in fifth standard itself.(around 11 years old)

Of course, we were too yooung to have an ejaculation, still this is my earliest memory of any kind of sexual activity. Over the years, I had many occassions to identify my liking towards homo-sex. Finally I am convinced I am a GAY.

At this point, I must confess, I have not had any sexual activity with opposite sex so far.But, I enjoy homo-sex and apart from sex, I prefer male friends and male companions rather than the female ones.